Songs for my Family I don't get many things right the first time In fact, I am told that a lot Now I know all the wrong turns, the stumbles and falls Brought me here And where was I before the day That I first saw your lovely face? Now I see it everyday And I know That I am I am, I am The luckiest What if I'd been born fifty years before you In a house on the street where you live? Maybe I'd be outside as you passed on your bike Would I know? And in a wide sea of eyes I see one pair that I recognize And I know That I am I am, I am The luckiest I love you more than I have ever found a way to say to you Next door there's an old man who lived to his nineties And one day passed away in his sleep His wife, she stayed for a couple of days And passed away I'm sorry, I know that's a strange way to tell you that I know we belong That I know That I am I am, I am The luckiest There are a lot of songs that I love to sing to my babies. That one is for me, I am the luckiest....I have two of the most wonderful children in the world. And I am the luckiest to have such a great husband who works hard so that I can be the mother I've always wanted to be. I don't know what we'd do without his love and support. I love to sing "Puff, the Magic Dragon" to the boys. They heard the song in utero and it seems to calm them whenever they hear it. I changed the words when I sing it from "Little Jackie Paper loved that Rascal Puff" to "Elliott and Cooper loved that Rascal Puff" "Angels are Watching Over Me" and "Baby Mine" are also favorites that I love to sing to my children. To Elliott, I love to sing "You are My Sunshine" because he brightens up a room with his charismatic smile. To Cooper, I love to sing "Hush Little Baby" and he just giggles as I tickle him when I sing "mama's gonna buy you a....." And I will end the is entry with a song you've heard from the moment you were born...we've sung our favorite version of "Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star" to you both every day Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star How I wonder What you are Up above the world so high Like a diamond in the sky Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star Do you know How loved you are?

Remembrance This day has significant meaning in our lives, and not just because of the tragedy that occurred in NY, Pennsylvania and Virginia in 2001. It's what occured a year later, in a doctors office in Greenville. It is where for the first time, we got a glimpse that our pregnancy was solid and my beta numbers were rising. The numbers were so high in fact, I started to wonder if I was carrying multiples. I had taken two pregnancy tests at home, the first one on September 8th just after my girlfriend Sandee called me to tell me her grandmother had passed. I stumbled into the bathroom bright and early around 6:30AM and saw what appeared to be a faint positive. Surely I was seeing things. I called Jonathan, who was at work, and told him the news. I told him to look at the test when he got home, if he sees two lines then I'll start believing it. You see, I had taken a test the day before, and had a big fat negative. I went online to my chat group for support, and was quickly told that I need an early response test to pick up the hcg hormone that a woman's body puts out when she is pregnant. Silly me, I wasn't aware that were levels of pregnancy tests. So, I went out to buy one of these so called early detection tests and awaited my first mornings sample :) Ok, back to Jonathan who comes in from a hard nights work, and crawls into bed. "Did you see the test?" "Um, no.....I forgot....and I've already taken out my contacts" Great, just great.....without his contacts, Jonathan is as blind as a bat...He would never see that line. He got up and went into the bathroom and was back. Silence, I was dying....what did he see??? He curled up behind me and nuzzled my ear and said "Looks like we are going to have a baby!!" Those were the happiest words I could have ever heard.... ***I also remember I had a dream around that time, it was of me and three other people in a doctors office. I was laying on the table and the doctor was placing the doppler on my belly to hear the heartbeat. There were two other women in the room, but I could never make out their faces. We listened to the whoosh, whoosh sound of the heartbeat generated from the right side of my abdomen, when the focus turned towards the left side of my belly. The doctor said "Do you want to hear the other one?" I sat upright in bed and exclaimed out loud "THE OTHER ONE??!!" It was then that I knew that I was carrying twins. It would be weeks later before our first sonogram would confirm that I was indeed carrying twins. So, you see September 11, 2001 was a great loss for our country.....and September 11, 2002 was the birth of our family. Current Mood: thankful

Our Rendition of 'Born To Be Wild' Got our bellies filled up Headin' for our toy room Lookin' for adventure And to make things go V-Room, Oh mommy, don't come and catch us We're tearing up this space Elliott is chasing Cooper Like it's some kind of race Play food in the kitchen Books are all on the floor Elliott's saying "ge dow" Coopers standing in a drawer Oh Mommy, don't come and catch us We're tearing up this space Elliott is chasing Cooper Like it's some kind of race Like a true, nature's child We were born, born to be wild Only one thing makes us cry When our diaper’s not DRY BORN TO BE WILD!!! BORN TO BE WILD!!!

Raindrops on Roses and Whiskers on Kittens It has been awhile since my last entry so I decided to post a lengthy one. The boys and I went to VA for my nephews court case. The trip, for me, was full of quiet reflections of past to the present. I remember as if it were yesterday that my nephews Scotty and Joey were born. I remember anxiously awaiting the day that I could hold them in my arms. Watching them grow was a real treat, and I have great memories of them growing up tucked away in a special place in my heart. Scotty will turn 18 in October, and Joey will turn 17 in December. While I was in VA, I looked back on my first year as a mommy and realized there are things about Cooper and Elliott that I miss. I also reflected on their first "loves" and favorite things. I miss how Cooper used to softly cry "Ah-gee, Ah-gee". We jokingly teased that he was saying "Hungry, or Ok, Ok". His first cry is something I will always remember. I also remember how he would gently rub from the back of his head to his forehead while nursing. Sometimes he would rub the back of my arm while nursing, and from time to time, he still does. Elliott, who was the second born, quickly took the lead in being the first to do things. He was the first to roll over onto his stomach (July29). He preferred rolling from place to place to crawling. Their first trip to the beach when they were just 12 days old! Then their first vacation and putting their feet into the ocean!! Elliott quickly fell in love with the swing and would not go to sleep without it. As a result, we had to purchase a travel swing to take on trips! Nowadays, Elliott still loves a swing and we no longer have to put batteries in it, for he has taught himself how to swing, back and forth! Elliott’s favorite toys are anything that resembles a steering wheel. He will quickly turn a little tykes vehicle on its side just so he can spin the wheels!! He also loves a blonde haired boy Little People figure that we have named “Little Man” (sometimes he will not go to sleep without it). Cooper is a ball man, he loves to pick up and throw balls. We think we have a future Nascar driver and Major league pitcher!! Their first baths, ah the good ole days....back when the only thing that got wet was the tub. These days Cooper will plunge into the water and "swim" on his belly, splashing water everywhere!! I'll never forget when Cooper leaned over and began to lap up the bath water like a puppy!! Elliott loves his baths too, he carefully splashes water by doggy paddling with his hands as if he "digging" into the water! I remember the excitement I had when I felt Cooper's first upper tooth. I was on the telephone with my girlfriend Sandee and was letting Cooper gum my finger when I felt something sharp! It was interesting as their teeth came in that Cooper had 3 upper teeth going towards the left and Elliott had 3 bottom teeth going towards the right! I thought that they both were going to have snaggle-puss smiles for quite some time!! Then came the boo-boos, Elliott’s first serious boo boo came when he fell and hit his chin on his wooden activity cube. It ended up being a small scratch, but he cried as if he had broke something. Cooper never suffered many injuries; mainly he was a teething ring for Elliott. Elliott loved to chomp down on Cooper, and Cooper's back, arms and legs really took a beating. Elliott used to chomp down on me too, my upper arms looked like I was a battered woman from all his bite marks! I remember one morning Elliott had bitten Cooper on his forearm, and later that same night Cooper bit Elliott in the exact same spot (must be something to that “twin pain” theory). Elliott also fell down about 6 stairs at my mother’s house....I have mentioned gray hair before....that nearly gave me a heart attack! Elliott also was a "squirmer" while nursing in bed and twice he fell off the bed (this happened two days in a row during the week of their birthday). Cooper is our climber and he takes on any challenge without fear. His most recent climbing trophy was awarded for climbing up the metal slide at MeMaw's and PawPaw's. He didn't climb up the "ladder side", but went up the slide with a rapid crawl then standing position as he approached the top! Their baby dedication was almost cancelled due to their first time experiencing a hurricane. Hurricane Isabel quickly came and went, but left us without power for a week. We miraculously regained power the evening before your dedication! You both looked so handsome in your Quaker styled white rompers. Their first Christmas….sitting on Santa’s lap for the first time. Elliott pulled at Santa’s beard!! Watching them look at all their presents, and they loved watching their choo choo train go around the track. Their first time in the snow...Cooper just loved sitting on the ice covered snow, but Elliott didn't want to have any part of it!! Elliott was the first to sit up on his own, which he did in such an odd fashion. He would try and sit up while lying on his back, in what looked like a standard "sit up" would be performed. Cooper took the tried and true version to sitting up. The ole lean to the side and push himself until he was propped up in a sitting position. Their first big boy haircuts at the barber, watching them become my "little men". Ah, and the first birthday...they both were so tired and possibly a little sick but what a blast that first birthday was!! All their cousins (first, second and third), aunts, uncles, grandparents and closest friends of the family were there to celebrate. Elliott loved the Clown, and Cooper didn't seem to mind her much as long as she was running with him in her arms! They both loved playing in their ball pit and received so many nice gifts! They both started babbling next, and I noticed that they would "sing" to each other...."da da da ha--da da da ha". In the mornings, who ever was awake first would call out to the other with that song or they would babble ah-da da, ah-da da over and over again until the other one would echo the same! Elliott’s first word was MeMe and Cooper’s was DaDa. Cooper has learned the sign for milk and cause it “gilk” (we are not sure why). Elliott loves to babble “bye bye” and “tickle tickle tickle”. Cooper loves to say “cook cook” whenever he sees a box of vanilla wafers!! He also prefers to call anything that walks on four legs “kitty, kitty, kitty”! Cooper took the lead in taking those precious first steps, he walked 3 ft. without falling (this was on June 8th). Elliott quickly took notice and was up and walking the very next day. Elliott, in fact was walking much more frequently than Cooper for the next few weeks. Their first steps with arms held up for balance as they "toddled" to and fro was a milestone that I will always remember! Favorite foods were something else, they both loved Sweet Potato Soufflé by Beechnut. Cooper took to finger foods first and loved the banana and sweet potato puffs from Gerber. They look like little puffed daisies. They both loved Country Garden Vegetables, and I would always say "here's your green pudding" because they both wanted it with every meal! Elliott’s favorite meal was macaroni and cheese, Cooper loves everything…….we have yet to find something he dislikes!! They both love yogurt and we call that ice cream. They were not much into sweets (you barely touched your birthday cake). I miss their tiny hands, and tiny feet...Elliott had such long and skinny legs when he was born!! I love to look at their little socks and reminisce of holding their feet in the palms of my hands. I have put favorite outfits away for future use and as keepsakes. Their daddy loved the ECU and NC football jersey onsies that they were practically swimming in when they were first born, but after two months had passed, they filled them out for our first family photo. I loved so many of their outfits, it would be hard to say which one would be my favorite. I loved all their outfits with matching hats, bibs and socks! Their turtle costumes for Halloween looked so adorable on them…..especially since we had nicknamed Elliott turtle for the way he would “turtle” his forehead as he started to crawl. Speaking of nicknames…..Cooper was affectionately named “Butter Bean” and Elliott was appropriately named “String Bean”. I am sure there will be many more nicknames to follow! So many memories for just one year……and I am sure there are many I have forgotten to mention. Thank goodness for journals and baby books, for without them, these little snips of thoughts here and there could not be carefully preserved. Thanks for taking the time to stroll with me down memory lane. Feel free to add to any memories you have of the twins!

outings with the boys Yesterday we went to Greenville, briefly to go to Sam's and to stop by Ms. Lynn's house. Outings are never spontaneous these days, as I have found there is an art to leaving the house. First, I have to make sure to pack the diaper bag with enough diapers to last all day, plenty of wipes, an extra outfit, mini vanilla wafers (or other snack food item), nooby cup full of water, bottled water (for mom and as back up if I forget the nooby), the cellphone (hopefully charged), and the car keys. Oh wait, depending on where we are going, sometimes it is necessary to pack a few of their toys to keep them occupied. In restaurants, I usually bring their bead maze or mirror that has suction cups on the bottom to secure them to the table. This usually keeps them occupied, but I've quickly learned the best toy at a restaurant is kids cups and spoons. In stores, I've learned how to push the stroller and pull a shopping cart with great ease. Sometimes rounding corners can be challenging, but I've found with lots of practice that there is nothing to fear. For outings with their stroller, I have snap on toys to entertain them. However, Cooper would rather pull at clothing and tags as we go by. Elliott loves to look for mirrors and make silly faces at himself. In crowded malls, some people can be quite rude and walk towards you forcing you to move either left of right quite abruptly. Early on, I learned that if I am looking away as I walk towards them, that they get out of the way for fear I will run over them. It is a walking version of "chicken", one in which the stroller wins every time. Of course there is the occasional bump to which I exclaim "Oh, I am so sorry" and clearly serves as reminder to move out of the way when they see a stroller in the future :) Today, we went to Barnes and Nobles with Ms. Lynn. Elliott attempted to take his nap and Cooper cried out "cook-cook" for vanilla wafers while she and I enjoyed frappacinos. I opted for the non-caffienated version, chocolate-chocolate chip. Before today, neither of the boys has shown an interest in sweets, much less chocolate. Which is odd, knowing what a sweet tooth I have. But today, Cooper decided he just had to have a sip of my frappacino. And thus, his sweet tooth was born. Elliott waking from his nap, did not want part of sipping the straw (he is still learning this new found skill). For the most part they were very well behaved, attracting several onlookers and the constant remark "Are they twins?". With twins, I have found that where ever we go that I have to allow for one to two 15 minute long chats with total strangers. Twins seem to be drawn to other twins. And I've learned there are more twins in this world now then ever before. People stop and tell me, they are a twin, or they have twins in their family, or a friend has twins. It's exciting for me to hear their stories, compare them with my own and for me to share our adventures. After, Barnes and Nobles I left to go to Hallmark. I've learned quite handedly how to manipulate doorways to get both myself and the double stroller through. There are "many-a-do-good" samaritans that come to my rescue and open doors allowing me to stroll right in. They often comment on "boy you have your hands full" and look at me as if I must struggle from place to place. I don't mind the looks, as long as they are opening the door, for it's one less door I have to open :) When actually, it is rather easy to get in most stores than people suspect. Especially when they are handicapped accessible, then all I have to do is just push a button. I prefer doors that open automatically, but when those aren't available, it is easier to enter doors that I have to push open rather than pull. I just enter the doorways backwards, pushing the door with my rear and then swivel the stroller clockwise until I reach the direction I want to go. It's an art form, and I am quite proud of it :) I've learned how to pop wheelies and jump curbs where there is no ramp provided. Some stores do not have wide enough walkways between their racks that allow for the double stroller, I learned this when I was on bed rest and would shop riding on one of those motorized carts. For those stores who aren't willing to provide wider aisles....I merely press through leaving the aftermath of "me, the twins, and a double stroller" can cause. Sooner or later, they'll get the hint..haha! So, as far as shopping goes.....with planning and a lot of finesse.....I've learned that there is no store that is off limits!!

the joys of teething Finally, our back molars have each emerged. My slobbering, drool-box, "part st. bernard" children have all four of their primary molars!! Mind you, the teething experience hasn't been all bad. I've heard nightmarish tales of what to expect from those that have been there, done that. Thanks to the makers of Baby Motrin, for without it, the teething experience may have been unbearable. Granted, Elliott has been more of the "temper tantrum" teether, becoming fussy around bedtime.......and Cooper did become more fussy AFTER each tooth emerged rather than the initial swelling. Nothing can really prepare you for the "joys of teething". Elliott's final lower molar emerged after he had what appeared to be a blood polyp just above his gum line. How I know this, is because he enjoyed moving it around with his tongue during feedings. Each time their teeth were ready to break through the gum line, their gums would swell up and becomes "squishy". Sometimes the gum line will actually bruise before the tooth finally pushes through. Then, as a excited mother, I would actually stick my finger inside their mouths to feel the rough passage of their newly acquired tooth. I have on many occasions experienced the "chomping" effect of Cooper and Elliott proudly demonstrating the use of their new teeth....OUCH! For me, each tooth is just another reminder that my babies are growing up, and the start of the next adventure. My babies love to sport a smile and show off their pearly whites....and it's amazing how just one emerging tooth can change a babies face into a more toddler like smile. Now, Cooper and Elliott each have 12 teeth......and grins that bring out huge dimples in their cheeks. Sometimes I look at Cooper and see myself, but when he smiles, I see reflections of his daddy. He has a "flirty" smile that fits right in with his batting long eyelashes. Elliott, who I feel looks a lot like me (minus the blonde hair), when he smiles it's like a "dennis the menace" cute mischievous smile. His smile is bright and vivacious. Already at the age of 15 months, they know how to work their "cuteness" with smiles that can melt my heart.

someone check the zoo....I am missing a couple of kids I've come to the conclusion, that Cooper must have indeed been switched at birth......by someone from the local zoo :) My affectionate new nickname for him is "monkey boy" as he loves to climb almost anything that he can muster his ham-hocks up and over! All kidding aside, Cooper seems to show no fear what-so-ever when it comes to heights. He used to climb up his toy box (not too far up to worry me, plus the toy box has containers that he sits in). From the toy box he began to cross over onto a three drawer dresser (ok, beginning to worry as this is somewhat higher without any railing on the side to prevent a fall). Now, my little man has advanced up to Mt. Changing Table, which he quickly can climb up and clear off the top of his high boy dresser in the blink of an eye (ok, mom is worried....grey hairs are sprouting left and right). Don't worry I don't need to run out and purchase one of those fancy video camera baby monitors, or set up some sort of alarm to notify me of Cooper's latest adventure. I have dear Elliott, who very distinctively shouts out "Ge Dow" over and over again until Cooper is rescued. "Ge Dow" translated into adult language is affectionately known as "get down". Gee, I wonder where he picked up that phrase? So it would seem that Cooper was alone in his rock wall climbing.....but lately I've noticed he has an accomplice joining him in the toy box. It's just a matter of time before Elliott seeks to out do his brother's latest climb, and I have to admit to the world.....I gave birth to monkey boys!

Wed, Aug. 18th, 2004, 05:05 pm To sleep, perchance to dream..... Ah yes, a full night of restful sleep.......for Elliott that is. Why does it always work out the nights my dear baby boy decides he will sleep through the night end up being the nights that I stay up until 1 or 2 AM? I could go to sleep when he does (around 11 or so) only to stumble out of bed around 2 or 3 AM fumbling toward his crib for his nightly feeding. It's a chance I take, to sleep or not to sleep. At least I did manage to sleep until Cooper decided he was in need of an early morning snack and pulled up to the drive-thru window bright and early at 6AM. I did manage to cuddle with him and sleep until the phone rang at 8:30AM. Surprisingly, I had to wake Elliott up this morning to get him ready to pick up his Daddy. How I miss a good, solid, nights sleep......But for now, it's easy to get by on a few hours here, and a few hours there. The real joy is snuggling with each of my babies during a few stolen hours in the quiet, stillness of the night. It's as if for just a moment, I can stop time and capture their innocence and seal it forever in my soul. And on the few occasions that Elliott decides to sleep through the night....I wake up refreshed yet longing for the time that we missed....Babies grow up too fast!

Oh what a fun day . We went to Greenville (Cooper, Elliott, Mommy and Daddy) to eat lunch with Grandma. We went to Chili’s Restaurant and you both were quite the attention getters. You both liked playing with the plastic kid’s cup. Cooper showed Grandma how he likes to “drop” things and have them picked up. You both spent the day outside in your exersaucers with the bubbles blowing in the wind. I must say you both got a little sun, you didn’t burn….but you do have a nice little tanJ Sometime in the afternoon Cooper had bitten Elliott on his left forearm (no one knew this because Elliott didn’t make a fuss about it). Later on after we came inside, you both were hysterical playing with each other. Mommy called Memaw and Pawpaw so they could hear you both cracking up laughing. Cooper would crawl like a “mad man” from the exersaucer to the coffee table to the couch and then to the play yard….Elliott thought that this was funny and would crack up laughing causing Cooper to laugh. Oh how Mommy and Daddy enjoyed watching you play like that for close to an hour. While Mommy was on the phone w/Pawpaw…Elliott crawled over to see what Cooper was doing near Mommy’s leg. Elliott went to bite Mommy’s leg but instead ended up biting Coopers left forearm….in the exact spot that Cooper had biten Elliott earlier today! It broke Cooper’s heart and he cried for 5 minutes! Mommy knows exactly how bad that hurt because she is Elliott’s favorite teething ring (Elliott prefers to bite her arms)

You are beginning to experience Cheerios. Both of you haven’t developed the ability to put them in your own mouths yet, Mommy has to place them in your mouth. Cooper will pick up the Cheerio and attempt to put it in his mouth but he always drops it off his chin! He did try and feed one to Mommy which was really sweet. Elliott will make a small scream when he is “demanding” to get something put in his mouth. He definitely lets me know when he is hungry. You both ate Stage 3 Food for breakfast, you had Mixed Cereal with Apples and Bananas; for lunch you had Stage 3 Chicken and Stars, Country Garden Vegetables, and apples and bananas; for snack you had Stage 3 Macaroni and Cheese (Cooper loved the mac n cheese; Elliott was not too crazy about it, he preferred his Stage 2 mac n cheese) and for dessert you had Banana Supreme. Cooper stood all by himself today. He was holding his teething ring in his hand and we figure he must have thought that was holding him up. He would drop the ring and fall down, pick up the ring, stand back up holding onto the piano, then let go of the piano and just stand there. Not to be outdone, Elliott stood all by himself later in the evening while only holding a plastic cup. It’s only a matter of time before they are off and running J