Let me Hold You Longer

Long ago you came to me,
a miracle of firsts:
First smiles and teeth and baby steps,
a sunbeam on the burst.
But one day you will move away
and leave me to your past
And I will be left thinking of
a lifetime of your lasts..........

The last time that I held a bottle
to your baby lips.
The last time that I lifted you
and held you on my hip.

The last night when you woke up crying
needed to be walked,
When last you crawled up with your blanket,
wanting to be rocked.

The last time when you ran to me,
still small enough to hold.
The last time that you said you'd marry
me when you grew old.
Precious, simple moments and
bright flashes from your past--
Would I have held on longer if
I'd known they were your last?

Our last adventure to the park,
your final midday nap,
The last time when you wore your favorite
faded baseball cap.

Your last few hours of kindergarten,
those last days of first grade,
You last at bat in Little League,
last colored picture made.

I never said goodbye to all
your yesterday's long passed.
So what about tomorrow--
Will I recognize your lasts?

The last time that you catch a frog
in that old backyard pond.
The last time you run barefoot
across our fresh cut lawn.
Silly, scattered images
will represent your past.
I keep on taking pictures,
never quite sure of your lasts......

The last time that I comb your hair
or stop a pillow fight.
The last time that I pray with your
and tuck you in at night.
The last time when we cuddle
with a book, just me and you.
The last time you jump in our bed
and sleep between us two.

The last piano lesson,
last vacation to the lake.
Your last few weeks of middle school,
last soccer goal you make.
I look ahead and dream of days
that haven't come to pass.
But as I do, I sometimes miss
today's sweet, precious lasts.......

The last time that I help you with
a mathing or spelling test,
The last time when I shout that yes,
your room is still a mess.
The last time that you need me for
a ride from here to there.
The last time that you spend the night
with your old tattered bear.

My life keeps moving faster
stealing precious days that pass.
I want to hold on longer--
want to recognize your lasts.

The last time that you need my help
with details of a dance.
The last time that you ask me for
advice about romance.

The last time that you talk to me
about your hopes and dreams.
The last time that you wear a jersey
for you high school team.

I've watched you grow and barely noticed
seasons as they passed,
If I could freeze the hands of time,
I'd hold on to your lasts

For come some bright fall morning,
you'll be going far away.
College life will beckon
in a brilliant sort of way.
One last hug, one last good-bye,
One quick and hurried kiss.
One last time to understand
Just how much you'll be missed.
I'll watch you leave and think how fast
Our time together passed.

Let me hold on longer, God,
to every precious last.

by Karen Kingsbury

You won't believe this....we thought it was over, I guess I will be the "fat lady" singing in the end.......I took a home pregnancy test yesterday and we saw two lines. I called the doctors office and they had me come in and do a test and blood work there. We could not get the blood test results until this morning but their urine test was positive.

We got the call from the RE's office.......

My BETA 192 (this is REALLY good)
Progesterone over 40 (all on my own no PIO shots!!)

I may have to go back on Friday for a "doubling" check since I've had the ectopic and the blocked tube.

My ultrasound is scheduled early March 10th to find out how many fertilized in utero.......we had 8 follicles altogether before the egg retrieval. I am guessing there may be more than one.....yesterday would have been 10days past a 3day transfer (had we made it to transfer) and my first beta when I had twins was only 76 at 11days past 3day transfer (it doubled to 188 at 13 dp3dt).....I am nervous with the bleeding scare we had on Tuesday....I seem to have irregular bleeding scares when I am pregnant, 1st one ectopic, 2nd with twins, and now this one!!

We are still in shock.....this is unbelievable......from no eggs at ER to seeing two lines......And I thought Cooper and Elliott were the last we'd seen of miracles.......but to have another like this......what a testimony I'll have to give at the end of a healthy pregnancy. I know we won't see heartbeats at our ultrasound because I'll be around 5 weeks then (by RE's nurse report)......but I am praying and will welcome all prayers that our pregnancy continue to be healthy!!

The phone has been ringing off the hook, so if you didn't get a phone call by me or my mom.....it's because our phone lines have been tied up!!