The Story Behind Our Random Acts of Kindness

We started Random Acts of Kindness 16 days ago.  I've been asked several times, why were doing it, how did we get started, and how has it impacted our family.  We have shared on here and on facebook, the things we have done.  In doing so, we have shared what we've done not for praise or thanks, but to encourage others to try or to see how easy it is to share a random act of kindness.   Too often, I would be guilty of hearing a story like we've shared, and thing...wow, that is so cool.  I would think that must have been an awesome experience, how great that there are still nice people in this world.  Then someone posted on facebook not too long ago..to get off the sidelines and get into the game.  And for some reason that clicked with me.  Why couldn't I try to do more, instead of sitting on the couch watching a show, get out and do more.  Could it make a difference.  Would it have an impact?  I can honestly say the impact we thought would be the pay it forward part, the thought of all these people passing a random act forward...but the greatest impact has been on our family life.  The planning and sharing of the process, what we've learned and discovered about each other along the way.  The boys have written in their journals and have developed a habit of being more aware of kindness whether it is random or an everyday act. 

When we've planned a random act, they never go as planned...we want to get something as a surprise and only twice (the movies and the fish) the recipient has been aware of who we were.  We've got plenty of random things that do not cost a thing on our radar (and have even done some) we have to wait for clearance at the homeless shelter, nursing home and food bank. Because of confidentiality we (being a family and not affiliated with a church or organization) didn't plan on the fact that places have coordinators and we have to be screened or the process. In many of the places we've called we have to arrange it with a coordinator and we couldn't just show up. We didn't factor that in when we just decided over Lent we'd give more of ourselves instead of giving up something in sacrifice.  Had we really thought it out we would have planned better to mix it up more, but just as as random as the acts we are participating in this came upon us rather randomly.  We did start off with randomly giving things, "writing letters", passing out kisses, picking up a neighbor's paper each day...and posted those....We really wanted the kids to get excited about giving. We scoured the internet for random acts of kindness ideas. There were tons of things to pick from. We made a limit that if we were to buy anything it had to be 5-8 bucks max. We do not have any money to spare so as a family we've had to cut back in order to give. I wanted the kids to see that you can give a little and see the impact it has. We soon learned that the random acts on the internet were filled with things like smiling at a stranger, give a compliment, open a door, etc. While these were all very kind things...we had a big family discussion about it. We talked about "everyday" kindness and "random" acts of kindness. We made a list of things we'd like to do, and if we were to receive a random act what would make us surprised and want to do a random act. We wanted to show everyone could do a random kindness act and even hope to inspire someone to try it. A few are joining in and they've shared things they've done.  And not every random act has to cost a thing...The movie ticket mission, we were gifted three movie tickets after viewing the Lorax. The manager gave them to us because there was a large crowd of school kids (after school program) and because it was so loud they offered our group that went to see the movie a  chance to come back and see it again. We had enjoyed ourselves at the movie, so instead of coming back and using them ourselves...we took those tickets and paid them forward. We are raising money for the Autism Society in a 5K race on April 28th. We donated money to the Jump Rope for heart at school. On the 24th we are helping to box items for the homeless shelter (while I am home visiting family in VA). I also volunteer at the school as an Odyssey of the Mind Coach so that 7 additional kids were able to participate in this years competition. I also volunteer at the school to help with their school store on Fridays. Yesterday Jonathan volunteered 8 hours drawing lab work at the homeless shelter for over 77 people. And once the weather cooperates we are going to "clean up the park" and another neighborhood family is going to join us. But I will have to say this, the one time that we did buy someones fish....and our random act of kindness cover was "blown" was one of the most touching stories. To run into the family again the next day and then they shared their story, I tell you it was so touching that two little fish gave them hope.  There have been moments like that where I felt that God had orchestrated or as a dear friend said it was a "divine appointment". The line between what an everyday kindness and a random act of kindness can be blurred at times. 

Just like the Stop KONY video, where those horrific acts were happening in Uganda and nobody knew or did anything about it, until this video made people stop and take notice.....that this happens in more places than we are willing to admit.  Too often people don't tend to notice acts of "everyday kindness" but they do stop and take notice of "random acts". We wanted the boys to really understand the difference. Also if more people are aware of random acts they would become more of the everyday kindness that is around them. One seed grows and the roots and branches may go in different directions but the seed started out as Kindness. And if one person just paid it forward it makes a chain reaction. 

The other side to the random acts of kindness it that we discussed with the kids not to have an expectation. We aren't doing them to pat ourselves on the back or say look what we did.  They discovered this when we passed out the candy kisses. Some people were in a hurry, some thought we were trying to "sell" something, some didn't want to be bothered....that we couldn't have expectations that what we thought was a kind gesture would be received as kind on the other end. We have learned so many lessons in just 16 days...and I am sure there are more to come. The real joy is when we are able to sit unnoticed and watch the expression on someones face when they open one of our handmade kindness cards. It is contagious and we wish we could do more...but the point of the acts we have done was to show how much one family could do and to see the impact it could have.   Volunteering our time and realizing that you can't just "show up to help" has been a hurdle we didn't plan on and it's something to consider if you want to plan those types of Random Acts into your routine.   I think the most important thing I would hope anyone would get from reading about our Random Acts of Kindness is to know that we all are capable of doing this and to realize that everyday we should be kind, but once in a while it is nice to be "random"....I often say this quote goes through my head the most over the past few days......"I do it for the joy it brings, because I am a joyful girl,because the world owes me nothing and we owe each other the world"......and the second one came at the end of the Lorax movie.... "Unless someone like you cares a whole awful lot, nothing is going to get better.  It's not."